Teens’ Chat Club - The Present my BB Wants Most

Eason: Hey Pop. What happened? You look very down.

Pop: Yeah, well, my girlfriend's birthday is coming up next month, but I don't know where we should go or what present to get her. You know I cannot afford expensive gift. Yet if I get something inexpensive, my girlfriend won’t like it. So I have no idea at all. Also, she wants to go to a romantic fine-dining restaurant for celebration, but I'm broke! How romantic can I be?

Eason: Wow, then you must be depressed all year - think of Christmas, Valentine's Day, and your anniversary with her. That's no good, but that's why today we are having two young people, Ken and Anna, to help you out.

Pop: Oh, great! Can’t wait to have a chat with them.

Eason: So I know you two are dating.

Pop: So, how long have you two been going out?

Eason: Hey, don't be so nosy.

Pop: Well don't you want to know?

Eason: Well, yes I do. Please do tell.

Ken: About a year and a half now.

Pop: A year and a half. That means you must have celebrated each other’s birthdays.

Anna: Yes we have.

Eason: So how do you celebrate birthday with each other normally?

Pop: Right, did Ken get you present or treat you to a fancy dinner? Did he surprise you? How did it all work out for you?

Eason: You flood them with so many questions. How are they supposed to answer? One question at a time!

Ken: Anna can tell you though.

Eason: So what did Ken get you, actually?

Anna: He made me a doll and a card with it by hand.

Eason: You mean this doll? Actually, what is it supposed to be?

Ken: So this is actually supposed to be a cat.

Eason: A cat! Ah, so sweet.

Anna: Though this doll is not very pretty, I was on cloud nine when he gave it to me.

Pop: But don't girls nowadays think it's cheap for presents to be handmade? Like, don’t they prefer brand watches, brand handbags or brand clothes? Will you the only you can be sure your partner really likes you is that he will shower money on you? Like, I might take a look at this doll and ask if Ken was sincere.

Anna: Well that's not always true. Money can’t buy everything. So I think what matters more is the intent. I used to think that if Ken had spent a lot of money on me, it would mean that I am important to him, but when he spent two weeks running all over the place picking out colors and materials to make me this doll. I was actually really touched and surprised about it.

Ken: We are only students. We can't afford to spend a lot of money. When we first started dating, I really had trouble thinking of what to get her. I have a friend who wanted to buy a brand wallet as his girlfriend's birthday present. So he had to ask around for loans as well as work part time for it. He had no time to study or play ball games with us. When he finally got the wallet for his girlfriend, she was actually blaming my friend for not spending any time with her. In the end my friend became so mad he broke up with the girl.

Pop: Oh... so, Anna, I want to ask if you have friends who would go out of their way to ask their boyfriend to get something expensive.

Anna: I have friends who are quite demanding, yes, but there is this one girl who loves to show off all her intimate things with her boyfriend, posting her expensive presents, cakes, etc. on social media. She always hangs out at expensive restaurants and does the check-in on social media, with captions or hashtags like “#lovely”, “#surprise”, “#thankyouBB”, “#dontfeelbadforyourwalletIwilltreasureyourpresentforever” and “#Iknowhowmuchyouloveme” or the like.

Pop: Are you envy of her?

Anna: Not really, I know her boyfriend and I don't want Ken to become like him.

Ken: Rest assured I never will.

Pop: So in return, Anna, had you ever got Ken anything? Before the show started, we learned that Ken has his eyes on a pair of brand sports shoes. So, have you thought of buying that for Ken?

Anna: I know which pair of shoes you are talking about, and I know Ken really wants them, but they are way too expensive for me. I don't agree on buying things by saving money from cutting on essentials. So instead, I made him a key ring of the pair of shoes and he really liked it.

Ken: She really put a lot of attention into it.

Pop: Well you look like very happy

Eason: So the lesson is that the most important things in a relationship should be understanding and caring for one another, rather than only being materialistic. The price tags on presents shouldn't be the most important consideration, like what Anna says, it should be the thought that counts.

Pop: The thought does count for a lot. I want to ask the both of you if you'd visited any “romantic places” in particular, like a fancy restaurant for the romantic atmosphere.

Eason: There are more romantic places than just fancy restaurants.

Pop: Well I'm not asking you. Anna, what do you think?

Anna: At the beginning my head was really full of romance, but as time goes and I get to know Ken better I realized that romance is only a part of the relationship. On top of romance we also need to fulfill daily practical needs, to work hard on academic and to develop mutual understanding.

Pop: Huh, so girls aren't even that interested in romance.

Ken: Well there must be romance in a relationship, but it's not something that you have to go out of your way to spend money on. For instance a walk on the beach is romantic. I keep reminding myself that spending too much on romance makes it wasteful, and I also need time to study, to spend time with my friends and family. If we spend too much time on a love relationship and leave no time for ourselves, then we lose out on what defines ourselves too.

Pop: I see. Huh, you two are really made for each other.

Eason: Of course, they wouldn't be dating otherwise, would they? In truth a lot of people spend a lot of time dating, shopping or going to the movies, and think all this leads to a better relationship but what's more important is to devote yourself to care for each other, that's how we can maintain our relationships. After all, love isn't all about just being romantic and materialistic.

Pop: Nice, so there can be love without romance and money! Now I know how I can save up.
Eason: You can't be so stingy, Pop. What's a romantic relationship without the romance? But as a couple, you must learn to be true to your other. Whenever there's an argument, it's better to be honest to each other. After all, true love can only stem from an honest and truthful relationship.

Pop: Well I've learned a lot today! And I have yet to figure out what to get for my girlfriend.

Eason: Well, don't worry, because the show is about over. You can have the whole day to think over that question. Many thanks to Ken and Anna.

Pop: Thank you both.

All: Bye Bye.

Student Health Service, Department of Health